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Goals, the Key to the New Decade

While there are many folks out there arguing if the new decade starts in 2010 or 2011, one thing for sure it’s a new year and obviously many like myself made new resolutions to live by and all seem to have a common thread, that 2010 will be better than the previous year.  I wholeheartedly agree and without getting too personal in my life I’ll give you insight on my thoughts for the New Year.

As humans we all make mistakes, and Lord knows I made quite a few in the past decade, the key is how we learn from these mistakes.  My greatest mistake in the last decade was trusting in too many people that promised so many great things, often that lead me to promise others things I found out I could not deliver unless the promises made to me became reality—some did, most didn’t.  I trusted too many people and that alone impacted some of my own integrity—but I’ve learned from it, trust less, trust yourself and your gut more.

Still my best friend in life, Rhonda.

Still my best friend in life, Rhonda.

I’ve always been taught to help others, that I did in the past decade more than ever.  Many took that help and never looked back and said thank you, others did say thank you, and the reality of it all, I learned who were truly friends for the sake of friendship and were friends only for their own personal gain.  Obviously during this trial of friendship you separate the two, sometimes more quickly than others—but ultimately you know who they are and they know who they are too. My mantra is simple, never be a quitter, always look forward.  Keep the passion alive and the passion will guide your goals.

I set many goals in the previous decade, some I didn’t accomplish, but the importance is that I set my goals.  My goal strategy is like in the military promotion board system for noncommissioned officers, we express long-term and short-term goals as part of our promotion evaluation.  While 2010 will start out tough at first, I foresee that it will finally begin to flow much smoother than the past, especially if I stay focused on my goals, perhaps I will even get promoted.

My short term goal this year is to push very hard in getting my “photographic therapy” concept out to many, my long-term goal is to realign my business back to a level higher than it once was, to move more forward in my photography and writings in a more positive manner without impacting it in negative fashion from potentially false friends and false promises. It’s time for me to use the lessons learned to help decipher quicker who is real and who is in it for their own benefit.  It’s time for me to make wiser decisions and focus more on what I do best based on experience, passion, and creativity.

In the new decade, as I’m one of those that feels the decade started in 2010, I plan on avoiding conflict, poor decisions and learning to filter the real from the unreal.  I plan on spreading the gospel of photography in every possible way my passion guides me to do so, for the benefit of others of my choice, and those that stand with me will gain, those that don’t, will be short-lived in my life as I have far less room for error in this decade as I get older and much wiser.  Separating the real from the unreal only gets easier because I don’t live the past, I’ve learned from it and learned there is always better.

Amazing Friends! Playboy Photographer and Casino Owner

Note: More behind scenes photos on my Facebook page!

Playboy's #1 Photog, Arny Freytag and I with Elite Model Jenni and KT

Playboy's #1 Photog, Arny Freytag and I with Elite Model Jenni and KT

As I return back from Las Vegas from a two-day semi-private instruction workshop and our three-day “Glamour, Beauty & the Nude” weekend workshop the thought of friendships come to mind—especially since I had several friends associated with this event, Arny Freytag, Gavin Maloof, Igor and Lucy Rivillis, Holley Dorrough, Jeff Whitted, Stephanie Dawn, the group of photographer attendees and my team of talented models.

Arny Freytag, Playboy’s top photographer, provided amazing instruction as a guest to our semi-private instruction first few days.  Gavin Maloof provided us with VIP treatment at his Palms casino and even had us over his house one evening so we could watch the NBA team he owns, the Sacramento Kings on his gigantic television in his theatre room.  Igor & Lucy Rivillis joined us for any support we needed as usual, and of course, I couldn’t have pulled this workshop off without my second in command, my make-up artist, Stephanie Dawn from Atlanta.  My models, what can I say, without them our lenses are left lifeless.  My hat’s off to all eight of the them and especially the attendees for all their efforts—everyone pitched in to make this Las Vegas workshop a cherished memory.

Palms Casino and Sacramento Kings owner Gavin Maloof at his house with (L to R) Stephanie Dawn, Playboy photographer Arny Freytag, Playboy Playmate Holley Dorrough, myself, Elite model Jenni and KT

Palms Casino and Sacramento Kings owner Gavin Maloof at his house with (L to R) Stephanie Dawn, Playboy photographer Arny Freytag, Playboy Playmate Holley Dorrough, Elite model Jenni and KT

Over the years I’ve had the pleasure of meeting many people, with those encounters comes new friends, though not all friendships last, which often makes me wonder how people generally define friendship.  When I was much younger our parents would make us watch 60-minutes and in one famous interview, the late Malcom Forbes described the meaning of success as when you could truly identify one real friend for each finger on each hand—Forbes claimed he was still working on his first hand.

Elite model Jenni poses while shooting at the Sky Villa Penthouse, Palms Casino during my workshop.

Elite model Jenni poses at the Sky Villa Penthouse, Palms Casino during my workshop.


I’m sure a lot of people who thought they were his friend that day, questioned with a gut check, their own definition of friendship.  Mine is simple, I follow Forbes formula when it comes to gauging my success, but I break down my friendships into two categories, business and personal, though sometimes the two will mix.  Then I further breakdown those friendships into the subcategories of political and realistic as I know many friendships exist for political correctness in today’s society.

So a politically correct business friendship is just that, they will only be around while it’s for the benefit of business and politically correct—Martha Stewart is a great example of learning who her business and personal friends were during her legal crisis.  I saw it in the U.S. Army when Command Sgt. Major Freddy Manning was the senior enlisted soldier who only answered to the United States Southern Command (USSOUTHCOM) Commander-in-Chief, Gen. George Joulwan.  We were all a team and everyone loved the SOUTHCOM sergeant major, everyone was his friend, from four-star generals on down, from every branch of the military.  While his uniform and position commanded respect, Sgt. Major Manning respected his troops and they respected him and his retirement ceremony was that of a general’s.

Eleya poses in the hot tub of the Sky Villa penthouse suite at the Palms Casino.

Eleya poses in the hot tub of the Sky Villa penthouse suite at the Palms Casino.

A few years after his retirement, I visited Sgt. Major Manning down in Georgia as we had done the Latin American Drug War together while I was stationed in USSOUTHCOM, and prior to that, we had been stationed together at V Corps in Frankfurt where he was the V Corps Command Sergeant Major.  We had more than a politically correct friendship, we both put in four years working personally for Gen. Joulwan at V Corps then USSOUTHCOM.   We traveled extensively together and on trips, you tend to bond.

While a few people stayed in contact with Sgt. Major Manning, he felt somewhat abandoned because after he quit being Gen. Joulwan’s right-hand man, the Christmas cards stopped flowing in and he was an example of having many “friends” that were only politically correct friends.

While our Vegas workshop was awesome, it had a few glitches, though my friend Gavin Maloof came through as a true friend to help us out and this says a lot about his character as he has no reason to be a “politically correct” friend with me—what can a photographer of my caliber bring him?  Nothing, the man has everything from owning a top Las Vegas casino, an NBA basketball team and even the ARCO arena they play in.  But Gavin Maloof was there to make sure we had what we needed.  Now that’s a friend and I salute you my friend.

Playboy's number one photographer Arny Freytag, Elite model Jenni and myself at the Palms casino on the day we arrived.

Playboy's number one photographer Arny Freytag, Elite model Jenni and myself at the Palms casino on the day we arrived.

I salute all my friends, especially those that helped out so much this past week to ensure Las Vegas was a success—you know who you are and what part you played!  Arny Freytag, I can’t say more than enough and I’ll see you soon in Jan. then in February as a VIP guest at my Los Angeles workshop.  And for those that want to know, yes, we’re back in Las Vegas (info here).

Thanks, and as I close, I ask everyone to not forget our military members, their families and friends, especially over the upcoming Christmas holidays, God Bless!  Rolando Gomez

Top Friends? Myspace, Facebook, etc…

I’ve often talked about therapeutic photography, or photographic therapy, the power of photography to help build or rebuild self-esteem, but here recently, I’ve also noticed another power, the social networking power.

Myspace, Loyalty, Frienship, Models, Photographers, Digital Photography, Youtube, Facebook, tag, pets

While that topic can encompass many areas, especially with Myspace, Youtube, Facebook and other powerful social network communities, one thing they have in common, is the ability to “tag” (comment) each member in your friends network. It’s not only addictive, but those members with marketing savvy use these peripheral options along with their blogs, bulletins, announcement, photos, tagging of photos, pets, walls, groups, etc. and more as great marketing tools within the network.

This marketing of oneself is not only the selling of one’s products and talents, but of themselves and often for their own ego and self-esteem. Often a popularity contest, I have more friends, comments and tags than you! In the Myspace “pets” application, the goal isn’t to be the owner of pets, but to increase your net worth, though this is often perceived as a popularity contest more than disposable income. Many members of these sites are not only concerned about how many friends they have, but if they are on, and in what order, their friends, “Top Friends” lists.

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